Look, Mom! No swears!

My mother IMed me the other day. The absurdity of that statement is rivaled only by its improbability.

I had put up an away message with a link to this blog, which she dutifully clicked on and discovered this site. After reading my latest entry, she IMed me again, and this was the resulting conversation:

Mom: I'm reading "Let me get this straight." What on earth is it?
Meldraw: Ha! That's my blog.
Mom: I don't remember you mentioning you had a blog.
Meldraw: No? I started it a couple months ago. It's just a random thing.
Mom: Good writing, except for a couple of inappropriate words.
Meldraw: Inappropriate?
Mom: If I were an English teacher I would ask you, "Don't you have the intellect to express yourself without seeking the lowest common denominator?"
Meldraw: It's probably a good thing you're not an English teacher, then.
Mom: “Mother” will do...
Meldraw: My blog is for me to express whatever I want without feeling constricted. That's probably why I’ve never brought it up to anyone in the family. It's not that I don't want you to read it or anything, it's just that it is a separate entity.
Mom: Point taken. You just don't want a potential employer or customer to run across it and be negatively influenced. Everything you do is a self-portrait. How do you want to look?
Meldraw: My name is not attached to this website.
Mom: Your screen name is on it.
Meldraw: What are you trying to say? I'm not ashamed of what I've written.
Mom: Just what I said before. You write extremely well. Just don't be crude if ten thousand people are going to be looking at it.
Meldraw: Ten thousand? I think I have ten regular readers. But I will keep that in mind.

[pause]

Meldraw: Are you going to start reading my blog now?
Mom: Probably. I'll put it on my list of favorites and check in periodically. You do write well. Will that freak you out?
Meldraw: No.

[pause]

Meldraw: I'll try not to swear.
Mom: Love you.
Meldraw: Love you.